I’m nervous, anxious, tired, dizzy. Enjoying cycling. Need to get away from here. Uncertain, unconfident, nervous of everything.
Later the same day, or the following day, I’ve just briefly imagined myself on the morning train passing through Lewisham. I just about miss it, that daily routine, a feel of being a part of something. Something I only grudgingly half accept I am a part of. Returning to that life is inevitable, I don’t want to, but keeping a faith in a world beyond the current stasis is stimulating, and gives an aim. I can’t see it as permanent though. Nothing is permanent now. Perhaps we all will seek change now.